The last blog I wrote was published in 2023. The following year, I was blessed to work on multiple projects until something quite unexpected happened. I started seeking professional help (again).

A Little Bit of Recap

If you have known me for a long time, it is no surprise to find out that I have been struggling with something that I have never been sure of. Why? Because I have never fully committed to every counselling session before. And why was that?

That question alone triggers my brain to write about seeking help from a professional and going to therapy. Personally, I just need to let things out of my head, so I can later rest well at night. The content I write in this blog reflects my personal perspective and journey of seeking professional help.

The Idea of Counselling with a Therapist

The word ‘therapist’ might be new if you’re not familiar with mental health services. Therapists include psychologists, psychiatrists, and other mental health professionals.

My first encounter with a mental health concern was during my adolescence, when I later met a psychology student in a social pageant contest back in 2017. Our interaction somehow made us close enough to talk about my struggle at that time. She was also working on a task and/or researching for her study, and asked me to be part of it. And I willingly said yes. Later, her case study concluded that I needed to seek professional help.

I remember how she told me that if I ever finally seek help, I must at least be willing to commit throughout the process. That is like the fundamental requirement for efficient counselling. In 2019, I visited several professionals, but my main focus was on material preparations for my solo exhibition project.

Unfortunately, when I was about to continue the counselling to focus on my well-being concerns, there was a COVID-19 pandemic strike. And one of my therapists sadly passed away.

From then on, I started to delve more into mental health and the concern that has been bothering me. I read thousands of articles and books. Listening to podcasts here and there. Practising self-counselling. And was it helpful? Temporarily.

Why Professional Exist and How the Therapy Help

I sought professional help again in early 2023. By this time, I was already in Bali, far from home. I tried online counselling through an app, which helped initially. But once again, I left it halfway through.

Until it hits me again in late 2024, this time was serious. So I booked an offline counselling session at a mental health clinic. The difference in this action was my mindset. As a patient, I am genuinely ready to be honest, and I truly wanted to commit to the entire process. While in the past, I was not prepared for that. Perhaps I was too young and too scared for reasons that made sense at the time.

I never skipped a session this time. I follow through with the whole therapy that is designed by my therapist. And surprisingly enough, a year has passed already. I grow. In only 2–3 more sessions, my therapy for this concern will come to an end.

Going back to the last paragraph I wrote on the previous heading. I used to feel terrified to approach mental health services, even more so to physically visit the place. Because of this, I tried self-counselling, but unfortunately, it did not work for my case.

The counselling I did and still do with my therapist enlightens me that to make therapy work, it needs a collaborative process. Thus, I can conclude that the reason why my self-counselling process does not really work is that there is a lack of professional guidance. If self-counselling works for you, that is wonderful. If it does not, you may benefit from additional professional guidance.

And to Sum It All

I am unsure if it is appropriate to mention my therapist’s name. But if you happen to come across this, thank you for your help. For anyone reading this blog who would like more information about the mental health clinic, feel free to reach out to me.

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